A ghost from the past - a tiny play

An interesting start to the week as I received an email asking for the text of a very (and I mean very) short play I wrote some time ago for Gi60 which was staged a few times in the UK and US. This time it's heading over to a theatre in New York for it's mini-revival. Full text below! Looking over it I'd describe it as more of a sketch than a play, so I hope it raises a smile.

Househunting for Ghosts

 A ghost (white sheet) sits at a table, opposite a vampire (cloak and fangs).

Ghost:             I’ve been in a graveyard the last three years and the nightly wailing’s bringing me down.

Vampire:        There’s been an upsurge in consecrations in the area that you’re looking at but I think I’ve found the right property for you. Four bedrooms. Unblessed. Family of heathens. Three children. Full cable package.

Ghost:             ESPN and MTV Europe?

Vampire:        Oh yes, and the eldest can apparently see auras so you can play around with her a bit when you’re bored. I’ve two poltergeists looking to relocate-

Ghost:             I’ll take it.